31 October 2007

First comes love, then comes...

the baby carriage...
no, then comes Marriage

no...then comes the baby shower...
THEN comes Marriage...
THEN COMES the baby carriage ---
no, that came during the baby shower...
Well, anyway, TESS got MARRIED! :-)

28 October 2007

Seagul Sun

Seagul Sun
Originally uploaded by msohler.

I love this picture.
I love it.
It gives me hope.

26 October 2007


Whatever you can do,
Or think you can, begin it.
Boldness has power, and genius,
And magic in it.

- Goethe

22 October 2007

Halloween Young Run

This is so much fun.

I was one of the medal-givers at the Finish.

NOTHING can beat this assignment.

17 October 2007

I Will Follow You Into the Dark

A friend of mine showed me this on YouTube:

"I Will Follow You Into The Dark"

Love of mine, some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark.
No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me
"Son fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied.

You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
Cause we'll hold each other soon
The blackest of blues

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied.

07 October 2007

one week ago yesterday

I walked from dawning to daylight

and then took one step and another

one step and another

and so I go on

05 October 2007


Originally uploaded by WebSphinx.

This is a reflection of me in the window. But it doesn't look like me, it looks like my big sister Suzy.

I see her everywhere

Sue Lee

November 22, 1952 - September 28, 2007

Sue Lee, long-time resident of Passaic Avenue, Livingston
passed away on September 28, 2007 in St. Clare’s Hospital in Dover, from a recurrence of breast cancer.

A brilliant and creative student throughout her school years, Suzy appeared at the Guggenheim Museum in NYC as one of the HOUSE performers in avant-garde artist Meredith Monk’s JUICE in 1969. Named as a National Merit Scholar, upon graduation from Livingston High School, she was admitted into Sarah Lawrence College. Diagnosed in her freshman year as manic depressive, she left Sarah Lawrence, continuing her undergraduate studies at St. John’s College in Annapolis, MD, and for a semester at the Santa Fe, NM campus. Despite the complex issues created by her manic-depressive illness, she was able to complete the academically demanding course of study, receiving honors on her Orals, and graduating from St. John’s in 1976.

During her life, she worked in various capacities, including children’s librarian at the Chatham Public Library, peer counselor for PACT of Essex County, field worker for the US Census, clerical work with temporary agencies and with Prudential in East Hanover. Suzy provided inspiration to many as an artist’s model with the Riker Hill Art Park in Livingston, and as “Eve” for a massive bronze Adam and Eve by New Jersey sculptor, Michael Shachem. One of her most demanding life challenges was the companioning and care of her own mother, Ruth S. Lawrenson, as Ruth, in her eighties, declined in her own battle with breast cancer.

At her best, Suzy was a gifted, sensitive and compassionate human being, never happier than when she was able to relish the gifts of the world around her: gardens, living creatures, children and flowers, the affection of friends, the stimulation of literature and the Arts, the beauty of Christmas trees alight and the awakenings of spring. Her forays into mania took her to many regions unknown and uncharted by her family and friends, and her bouts of depression plunged her into depths few of us will ever comprehend. As she herself said, “It’s been a wild ride.” On this plane, her journeys are now over, and we who love her still, wish her peace.

Survivors include her sisters, Jeanne and Penny.

A memorial service in celebration of Suzy’s life will be held at the Morristown Unitarian Fellowship in May.

Donations in lieu of flowers may be made in Suzy’s name to Compassionate Care Hospice Foundation, 4949 Ogletown Stanton Road Ste. 107, Newark, DE 19713, or online at http://www.blogger.com/www.cchnet.net,
or to St. Clare’s Foundation, “Miracles” Campaign, 75 Bloomfield Avenue, Denville, NJ 07834.

01 October 2007

My Suzy

I am so...
surprised ?
unbelieving ?
uncomprehending ?

filled with sorrow

to find myself breathing in the world

without my big sister breathing in it

her last ten days we lived together at the hospice in NJ
breathing together
and now I am breathing for three
Mama, Suzy and me

grief so great
but so grateful
to have had her for the time I could